Catastrophising and anxiety: A feature of the mind, not a flaw
Key Insights:
Catastrophizing is unconscious, you can't simply choose to stop it
It's evolutionarily adaptive, your brain is trying to keep you safe
It reveals what matters most, fears point to your deepest values
Awareness, not elimination, the goal is changing your relationship to anxious thoughts
"I catastrophize all the time. What's wrong with me?!"
"People are always telling me to stop catastrophizing, but I can't. Why can't I stop?"
"Why does nobody else do this? Why am I the only one always imagining the worst in every situation?"
These are familiar voices I hear in my practice, and beneath them lies a hidden set of assumptions that make the problem nearly impossible to resolve. We assume we shouldn't catastrophize, that we should be able to control it, that we're uniquely broken for doing it, and that it serves no purpose.
What if everything we've been told about catastrophizing is not only unhelpful, but actively harmful?
The Myth of Mental Control
Here's what I've discovered after years of working with anxious minds: catastrophizing is largely an unconscious process. We don't choose to start catastrophizing, and we don't choose when it stops. If we could simply switch it off, we would have done so, and nobody would ever suffer with it again.
Expecting someone to "just stop catastrophizing" is like telling someone who's depressed to "cheer up." It doesn't help. It adds shame to struggle and assumes a conscious ability that simply isn't there. You might do yourself a favor and stop treating catastrophizing like it's something you're choosing to do. It's not a moral failing or character flaw, it's a feature of consciousness, not a fault in your character.
The only freedom from the mind, as Buddhist thinking suggests, is awareness of it. We can't control catastrophizing, but becoming aware of it may have its own inherent power. That awareness can change how the whole phenomenon operates.
What Is Catastrophizing?
Catastrophizing is the tendency to imagine the worst possible outcomes in any situation. It involves:
- Automatic thoughts about disaster or failure
- Vivid mental images of things going wrong
- Physical anxiety responses to imagined threats
- Difficulty distinguishing between possible and probable outcomes
The Evolutionary Logic
What struck me most in my clinical work was realizing that catastrophizing isn't irrational, t's the mind doing its best, perhaps clumsily or excessively, to protect us. Anxiety's role, evolutionarily and psychologically, is to anticipate potential threats and prepare us ahead of time. In other words, it's designed to project us into imagined futures filled with "what ifs." Catastrophising is its job.
We are descended from people who successfully catastrophized. Our ancestors who paid attention to what might go wrong were more likely to survive and keep their children alive. For them, social rejection could be fatal—ostracism from the group meant death in the wild. Illness could wipe out an individual or family and Isolation meant exposure to predators or starvation.
Catastrophizing about these scenarios wasn't a quirky mental habit; it was adaptive. It kept our ancestors vigilant about genuine threats. Your catastrophizing isn't merely an overreaction, it's the echo of an ancient, survival-focused brain trying, sometimes too zealously, to keep you safe.
The Map of What Matters
Here's something remarkable I've observed: when we catastrophize, we're not creating random horror stories. We're touching on what matters to us most. The fear of public humiliation after a presentation reveals how much we value respect, acceptance, or competence. Imagining the devastation of illness often shows our deep attachment to vitality, independence, or fear of burdening others. Fearing ending up alone speaks to our profound need for connection and belonging.
Seen this way, catastrophizing becomes a window into our deepest vulnerabilities and values. It's the psyche's way of broadcasting, in a distorted but powerful signal: "This matters. Pay attention."
When we meet these fears with curiosity rather than shame, we can learn a great deal about ourselves, not to eliminate the fear entirely, but to live more wisely alongside it.
Common Catastrophizing Patterns
Health anxiety: "This headache must be a brain tumor"
Social fears: "Everyone will think I'm stupid if I make a mistake"
Relationship anxiety: "One argument means we're doomed"
Work concerns: "Making an error will ruin my career"
Future planning: "Everything that can go wrong will go wrong"
The Shame Spiral
What makes catastrophizing particularly painful isn't just the anxious thoughts themselves, it's the shame we pile on top. We criticize ourselves for having these thoughts, which creates a secondary layer of suffering. Now we're not just worried about the imagined catastrophe; we're also ashamed of being "weak" or "irrational" for worrying in the first place.
This shame is culturally reinforced. We live in a society uncomfortable with uncertainty and negative emotions. We're expected to be positive, rational, in control. But this expectation ignores how human minds actually work. Our brains are meaning-making machines, constantly scanning for patterns and threats. That's not a bug, t's a feature.
How Therapy Changes the Relationship
If catastrophizing is an evolved, automatic feature of the mind rather than a personal failing, what can therapy actually do? The goal isn't to eliminate catastrophic thinking but to change our relationship to it.
Building awareness without judgment is the first step. In therapy, I help people notice when catastrophizing is happening without immediately believing the thoughts or condemning themselves for having them. This capacity to observe your mind, what therapists call mentalisation or metacognition, creates necessary space between thought and reaction.
Understanding the deeper meaning comes next. Rather than treating catastrophic scenarios as meaningless noise, we explore: What is this fear pointing to? What does it tell me about my vulnerabilities, needs, and values? Catastrophizing becomes a map rather than just a minefield, a map of where your wounds and longings live.
Discovering unconscious roots often reveals that catastrophizing isn't simply overactive imagination. It's frequently the echo of earlier experiences that haven't been fully processed. We catastrophize because we're carrying unresolved emotional material: past traumas, failures, humiliations, abandonments, losses. The conscious mind may not connect today's fears with those old wounds, but the emotional charge remains.
How Therapy Helps with Catastrophizing:
Develops metacognitive awareness - noticing thoughts without being consumed by them
Explores underlying meanings - understanding what fears reveal about values
Processes past trauma - healing old wounds that fuel current anxiety
Builds emotional resilience - strengthening capacity to feel without collapse
Reduces shame and isolation - providing accepting relational experience
The Integration Process
Through therapy, catastrophizing thoughts can arise without automatically sweeping you into panic or despair. Instead of trying to eliminate fear or worry, the work involves developing capacity to feel difficult emotions without collapsing under them. This emotional resilience means that when catastrophic thoughts inevitably arise, you're more able to weather them without being hijacked.
Sometimes this involves updating the mind's threat predictions through corrective emotional experiences, moments where you confront fears, discover you can survive them, and gradually update your brain's expectations about what's truly dangerous versus merely uncomfortable.
The therapeutic relationship itself provides something crucial: a space where you're seen not as broken, but as someone whose mind is doing something completely understandable. Being witnessed this way directly counteracts the isolation and self-recrimination that make anxiety worse.
Signs You're Developing a Healthier Relationship with Catastrophic Thoughts
You notice the thoughts without immediately believing them
You can ask "What is this fear trying to protect?" instead of fighting it
You feel less shame about having anxious thoughts
You can function even when worried thoughts are present
You understand the difference between possible and probable outcomes
Living with an Ancient Brain
The question isn't how to silence catastrophizing altogether, it's how to hear it differently, respond to it differently, and where possible, understand and heal the deeper emotional material that gives it such charge. It's a process of building resilience, growing insight, and integrating the parts of yourself that have long been trying to speak.
When we view catastrophizing as a meaningful evolutionary inheritance rather than a personal defect, it becomes easier to approach it with compassion and curiosity rather than hostility and self-contempt. The question shifts from "How do I eradicate this?" to "What is this trying to protect?" and "How can I respond to that need more skilfully?"
You're not dysfunctional for catastrophizing. You're human, carrying the wisdom and the burden of ancestors who survived by paying attention to what could go wrong. The challenge now is learning to honour that protective instinct while not being overwhelmed by it in a world where most of our fears are psychological rather than physical threats.
Frequently Asked Questions
Why can't I just stop catastrophizing if I know it's not helpful?
Because catastrophizing is largely unconscious and automatic. It's like asking why you can't stop your heart from beating. The goal isn't control but awareness and changing your relationship to these thoughts.
Is catastrophizing always a sign of anxiety disorder?
Not necessarily. Everyone catastrophizes to some degree, it's a normal brain function. It becomes problematic when it significantly interferes with daily life or causes severe distress.
What's the difference between healthy concern and catastrophizing?
Healthy concern is proportional to actual risk and leads to appropriate action. Catastrophizing involves imagining extreme outcomes that are highly unlikely and often leads to paralysis or excessive worry
Can catastrophizing ever be useful?
Yes, in moderation. It can help with planning and risk assessment. The problem comes when it becomes chronic, extreme, or disconnected from realistic probabilities.
How long does it take to change catastrophizing patterns?
This varies greatly depending on the person and underlying factors. Some people notice shifts in awareness within weeks, while deeper changes often take months or longer.
If you're tired of fighting catastrophic thoughts and want to develop a healthier relationship with anxiety:
I offer therapy in Berkhamsted that helps people understand these patterns and develop more compassionate ways of relating to anxious thoughts. This work focuses on awareness, not elimination.
Phone: 07717 515 013
Email: sean@seanheneghan.com
Located at: Berkhamsted Chiropractic Clinic, 69 High Street, Berkhamsted
About Sean Heneghan - Therapist in Berkhamsted
Sean Heneghan is a BACP registered counsellor helping people develop healthier relationships with anxiety and catastrophic thinking. He specializes in understanding the deeper meanings behind anxious thoughts and helping clients build genuine emotional resilience.
Serving Berkhamsted, Tring, Hemel Hempstead, St Albans, and the wider Hertfordshire area.